Willie Nelson, Frank Sinatra,
Hours and hours of Wagner’s operas;
I’m not saying they’ll do you harm–
It’s just that–I’m immune to their charms.
Artichokes and juicy rare steaks,
Home-made pineapple upside-down cakes,
Served with a cherry, cold or warm–
either way, I’m immune to their charms.
Boiled lobster, ample rears,
Romantic movies that bring my wife tears,
Outdoor plumbing at gentlemen’s farms–
One and all, I’m immune to their charms.
It’s not as if I got a shot
That inoculated me.
All these things may go to your head
but they don’t intoxicate me.
Nature not nurture is to blame–
I don’t know what else to say.
This stuff may bring pleasure, I know it’s a shame–
can’t help it–I was born this way.
Sports talk radio, German wines,
You can have ‘em, I’ll be fine.
Little red ants all alone or in swarms–
Either way–I’m immune to their charms.