Boys State Adds Philandering to Summer Leadership Program

BOWLING GREEN, Ohio.  In an effort to keep pace with current trends in American government, Boys State, the national summer leadership program for high school students, this summer has added a philandering component to its roster of activities.

Clinton and Kennedy:  “Angie Dickinson and Marilyn Monroe?  Wow!”

“We have a lot of young men who want to enter public service out of a sense of compassion,” said American Legion Regional Director Thurston Van der Wall.  “Other boys are called to government by the freely-available nookie.”

The ranks of politicians who cheat on their wives are a model of bi-partisanship, with big names from the Democratic Party such as Bill Clinton and John Edwards and Republican eminences including Rudy Giuliani and Arnold Schwarzenegger.  “I don’t know if I’d call it a trend,” said Allen Griswold, an on-line columnist for  “More like a tsunami.”

Boys State and its female counterpart Girls State are summer leadership programs sponsored by The American Legion and its female auxiliary in each U.S. state.  A mock legislature of students who have completed their junior year in high school meets to debate bills, accept payments from lobbyists and lose their virginity to mock interns.

Boys State alumni Mike Huckabee:  “In my free time I made a gimp lanyard–there were no mock interns back then.” 

A number of distinguished politicians have participated in the program, including former Arkansas governors Mike Huckabee and Bill Clinton, who was photographed with then-President John Kennedy at his session.  “I only hope I can carry on your tradition, Mr. President,” Clinton is reported to have said, “and I’m not talking about lower marginal tax rates.”